


Unspent Tears

by panthershabit



Category: Avengers: Endgame - Fandom, Black Panther (2018), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Short & Sweet, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-01-31 08:13:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18587287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/panthershabit/pseuds/panthershabit
Summary: *not based on what I have seen, this was a wip before I watched the movie*After the death of his best friend, Sam spends most of his nights crying in the middle of the night. When T'Challa hears him, he tries to comfort him.*summary was written before viewing endgame*





	Unspent Tears

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so as I write these notes, I'm hours away from watching Avengers Endgame and probably won't post this until tomorrow for my T'Challa x Everyone series. The plot of the story is obviously around Steve's death and if it does turn out to be canon, it could be a potential spoiler. But I won't confirm anything if it does happen.
> 
> Edit: Rewriting this to feature things that actually happen in Endgame, but some things have been changed. Spoiler alert - it's Sam having Steve's shield.
> 
> Kudos and Feedback are appreciated :)

Curled in their bed, Sam stared blankly at the red, silver and blue shield laid against their oak drawer as T'Challa slept comfortably with his arms wrapped around Sam's waist.  In times like this even the warmth of one hand across his face could comfort Sam, so sleeping with T'Challa next to him should have helped him cope through his days of loneliness but despite the affection, he still felt his throat tighten as his eyes become swollen with the tears that escaped each night and he had plenty more unspent tears to give. Steve was gone. Nothing could bring him back, not if they needed a world to stay in. But they all knew what was going to happen when Steve didn't return. 

Being a deep sleeper, T'Challa would usually sleep through the sniffles and abrupt shakes from Sam's body as he sobbed, mostly because Sam would occasionally unwrap T'Challa's arms from him so the monarch wouldn't be disturbed. But one night, six days after they'd won the war against Thanos to be precise, Sam was still heartbroken but the only exception with this instance was that he was too lost in his distraught thoughts to remove himself from T'Challa when he began to cry. He had no idea how to move on and with Bucky also coping with their mutual loss, they didn't talk like they used to.

Slowly shuffling, Sam sniffled and wiped his eyes with his vision fixed on the shield again. In a part of his mind, if he stared at it long enough he could convince himself that Steve would come back for it with that same devilish grin on his face and Sam would tease him as he used to, saying something like _'you got the receipt for it, Cap?'_. How simpler times were. Instead of raised eyebrows and teasing smiles, Sam wore a face of despair as the memories of the past circled in his head and T'Challa soon woke up after feeling the movements Sam made from sobbing.

Opening his eyes, he remained silent as he woke up from his slumber and heard Sam's sniffling and choked up weeps which when he was fully awake disturbed the king. He'd never heard Sam in this way before and although he could only see the back of Sam's head, he knew something was wrong with the former social worker.

"My love, is everything okay?"

T'Challa frowned and moved closer to Sam but Sam cleared his throat and chuckled.

"Yeah, it's nothing...don't mind me," he lied, throat still sore from the lump in it. T'Challa could hear the anguish in his voice and moved one arm from around his boyfriend's waist to raise his hand and he snapped his fingers which turned the lights on in the room. He'd gone the first few days without using his fingers to activate the lights, feeling insensitive of the situation but now it was back to being something normal to him. Well, more normal than turning to dust and living in a completely different world.

"Please, talk to me. I can tell you are distressed."

Sam was hesitant to speak but felt comfortable in T'Challa's warmth, so he turned his body around to face T'Challa and the king was visibly upset to see Sam so emotional. Despite his best attempts to keep his face clean, his nose ran and dried tears were overlapped by new ones. Using one thumb, T'Challa ran it over Sam's cheek to wipe away the tears even though he knew they would come back. 

"This is about Steve, isn't it?" T'Challa enquired, wearing a quizzical expression. "Do you wish to discuss it?"

It took a moment of silence as T'Challa held his palm against the side of Sam's face and his lip quivered. 

"What am I supposed to do?" Sam asked painfully, breaking into vicious tears. T'Challa cradled him and gently pulled them up so their backs rested against the purple button-tufted upholstered headboard. "I thought Riley fucked my head over...but this? I don't even know what to do. Bucky won't talk to me, and I-I don't know if it's because Steve gave me the shield or because it's-it's his boyfriend but I just don't know anymore!"

Burying his face in T'Challa's chest, Sam let it all out while T'Challa held him and despite feeling so horrible about everything, it felt good to have someone to listen to him. 

"How long have you felt like this?"

Sam didn't move his head from where it was and he nuzzled against T'Challa's chest before sighing softly, sounding defeated.

"I...since he left. Every night, I just look at that shield and think that one day, he'll just take it back. I'll be an asshole about it but he'll still be there to take it back."

Sam smiled for what seemed like an eternity, perhaps his thoughts felt better when they were said out loud in the comfort of his partner's hold. T'Challa stroked Sam's temple with his thumb and smiled himself.

"I understand how it feels if it helps. I've lost a cousin, my own life, and many friends, but one that stands out for me was my father. I did not believe I was truly ready for a life without him, and you know what he told me?"

T'Challa's soft, low tone soothed Sam and made him feel safe.

"What?" Sam asked quietly.

"If his children were not prepared for his death, he had failed as a father. And you know what? He was right. Steve clearly gave you that shield for a reason, because he knew you had the power and integrity to weld it, to protect the world as he did. And to live without him. As for James, he knows you are the right man for the job. Just like I do."

Sam smiled and felt happy about himself after feeling so terrible all this time. 

"Thank you, baby," he whispered. T'Challa laid a slow kiss on his forehead and nodded. 

"I'm sorry you felt this way and I couldn't help you earlier."

"It's not your fault...it's just you only just got your family back. I thought you deserved a good sleep and not to hear my own problems."

Hearing that made T'Challa frown and he braided his fingers with Sam's, holding his hand. 

"Samuel Thomas Wilson, your problems are my problems. And I didn't just get my family back, I got my life with you back. The fear I felt once I couldn't find you among the others will never leave my mind, I don't know what I would have done if you weren't with me."

Both of them were heavily grateful for being reunited together after turning to dust, and those five years were much easier with them in the same world. 

"I know," Sam started, moving from T'Challa's hold to gaze into T'Challa's welcoming eyes. "I love you, T'Challa." 

"I love you too, Sam. Now, if there's anything you ever want to talk about, please let me know."

The king of Wakanda wiped Sam's lingering tears away and snapped his fingers to turn the light off. Sam went to return to his sleeping position but T'Challa wrapped Sam's arms around his own stomach and had him facing T'Challa's usual side of the bed so he wouldn't have to look at the shield again.

In the darkness, T'Challa closed his eyes and so did Sam, both feeling happy with where they were. 

"Hey, baby, what sounds better? Captain America and Black Panther or The Falcon and The Black Panther?"

T'Challa snorted and grinned, even if Sam couldn't see his face he could tell T'Challa was doing exactly that.

"Why does my name go at the end?"

"You didn't answer the question..." Sam teased. T'Challa closed his eyes again and smiled.

"Whatever keeps you next to me forever."


End file.
